SPEAK LIFE
(Ref: James 1 & 3 | Colossians 3 | Proverbs 11 & 18 | Ephesians 4 )
Ah words. They can speak life and encouragement or death and discouragement. How often we are quick to speak and slow to listen. In today's social communication breakdown, it's far too easy for most of us to speak from the hip before truly thinking, "Do I really mean what I'm saying?"
CAN YOU REMEMBER THE LAST TIME...
- Someone was condescending and dismissive toward you, without any real motive or reason (it seemed)?
- Someone bombarded you with negative comments about you and your livelihood, while you were trying to convey positive comments about the very same things to them?
- Someone verbally undermined your achievements or abilities, when all you really hoped for was a bit of spoken encouragement or affirmation reinforcement?
- Someone mistakenly jumped to conclusions and passed judgment on you for something that you did, without first knowing all of the facts; without asking you for "your side of the story," as it were?
- You were trying to motivate someone with kind words, only for them to deflate each attempt by reiterating negative toxic "versions" of those things over themselves?
- You knew someone who could never take a compliment?
- You knew someone who could never give one?
- Someone seemed upbeat and usually had wonderful things to say, even if they were going through some serious rough road?
- Someone seemed grumpy and usually had horrible things to say, even if they were going through peaceful and prosperous times?
Watch this...
- Someone dismissed your walk with Christ (if you're a believer), because maybe you had certain sin struggles, or maybe... they believed that they were just a bit more "spiritual" than you?
You get the point by now, and you probably have mental images in your mind of a few people. Okay good. One more question:
- Have you ever been that "someone" in the questions above?
Ouch. Turns the tables a bit. We can churn up memories of others using their words in those ways, but usually find it much harder to recall the shoe being on the other foot. But ego is a powerful thing; one of the tenants that we wrestle with as imperfect, sinful human beings.
Let's not fall into the trap of New Age - Spiritism thinking with what I'm about to say next, because the truths and foundations of the following observations are completely Biblical and fundamental to how God has designed our souls (i.e. "the mind, will, and emotions").
PROVERBS 23:7 says, "As a man thinks, so is he."
Read in context, we'd see that this statement pertains to greedy and selfish people who are typically cunning and deceptive; not to believe their flattery or enticements. Yet in ways, it also speaks to a core truth about how the mind often works...
While concepts like "mind over matter" and "speak something into existence / being" are not rooted in any fact whatsoever, the concept that our state of mind can directly impact our perceptions of: hope, joy, sadness, misery, indifference, chances of success or failure, and being able to recognize meaningful opportunities as they arise—is.
It all begins and ends in the mind. Our minds dictate what we say. Our speech reinforces how our minds already think. A cycle. Change our minds and our speech will change. Change our speech and our minds will change. There's a slight realized symbiotic relationship happening there, it would seem. Bear with me...
There's something to be said for the power and influence over our minds by the things we speak aloud; where our cognitive minds hear these tenants of our thinking audibly. Akin it to how studying for school exams would often benefit from writing down and reading notes... in addition to verbally reciting them.
In the first case (studying), what we read begins to rewire our minds. What we think and "know." As do the words we speak or listen to. The more we hear and think something, the more our minds will rewire themselves to accept and believe it; it being true, factual or even rational —is irrelevant. The phenomena still occurs.
EXAMPLE 1: Jane believes that she's capable of doing whatever God leads her to do, if even by His strength and power, and not her own. She also embraces a mindset of gratitude, and is mindfully and verbally thankful for even the smallest things.
She doesn't view herself as a victim or castaway; nor inferior to any other person. She sees failure as part of life, and looks for ways to use those failures as opportunities to improve; even appreciating some of life's let-downs that were used to develop solid character and grit.
Her spoken vernacular will reflect this mindset. She's able to mitigate the downs by focusing on the ups, which keeps her mind more relaxed and stable. With or without noticing, Jane will inadvertently speak of those things in light of recognizing the downsides, while stressing the upsides.
Her words also reflect her inner hope and tenacity toward identifying good opportunities and setting beneficial goals. By not believing she's a victim, she's poised to not only recognize opportunities, but to move on them; as she's already thinking of what may go right (instead of wrong), reinforced by her hopefully resilient mindset and manner of speech.
Jane will often speak her mind, due to wanting to spread positive influence to those around her, whom she also wants to do well and to be well. This is Jane's default setting. Her routine vocabulary. People are more likely to respond positively or favorably to her, because the tone is set by Jane's speech, regardless of her confidence level (watch that?)...
EXAMPLE 2: John
believes that he's probably not capable of doing whatever God leads him to do, regardless of any variable. He also embraces a
mindset of bitterness, envy, and discouragement, and is mindfully and verbally expressive of mostly just those things. He's not grateful for much because he fails to see anything to be grateful for.
While he tries hard at most of what he does, he chronically views himself as a victim and underdog; assuming himself to be inferior to most other people. He sees failure as personal destruction and permanent damage, and looks for ways to use those failures as pleas for sympathy; often ranting to those who'll listen—about all of the reasons he should've succeeded in something, but it was "kept from him."
His spoken vernacular will
likewise reflect this mindset, as did Jane's. He's unable to recognize the ups because of constantly focusing on
the downs, which keeps his mind more anxious and scatterbrained. With or
without noticing, John will inadvertently speak of those things in light
of virtually ignoring most upsides, while stressing the downsides.
His
words also reflect his inner dread and negatively-bent rigidness toward identifying good
opportunities and setting beneficial goals. By believing he's a
victim, he's neither poised to really recognize opportunities, nor to move on
them; as he's already thinking of what will go wrong (instead of right), reinforced by his hopelessly bitter mindset and manner of
speech.
He may not even see good opportunities at all, while focusing with hypotheticals on any and all possible negative outcomes. John's mind and speech are defeating him constantly, before he ever sets anything in motion. Often self-fulfilling prophecies.
John (like Jane) will often speak his mind, due to wanting to spread
this negative influence to those around him, whom he (inwardly) wants to do as poorly as he does and be disgruntled like him. This is John's default setting. His routine
vocabulary. People are less likely to respond positively or favorably to him, because the tone is set by John's speech, regardless
of his confidence level (watch that?)...
Do we see a clear contrast between our characters: Jane and John? Let's refresh...
Our
minds dictate what we say. Our speech reinforces how our minds already
think. A cycle. Change our minds and our speech will change. Change our
speech and our minds will change.
THE LEGIT POWER OF OUR WORDS
Our thinking matters to God, as does our speech. And for good reason; as our Creator, He understands our capabilities and struggles alike—more than we ourselves do. So maybe, just maybe... He may have some valuable insight and instruction about using those tongues of ours?
Probably the most important Scripture of all on this...
PROVERBS 18:21
“Death and life are in the power of the tongue, and those who love it will eat its fruit."
In addition, we can gather plenty more examples and contrasts from Scripture. The book of Proverbs is especially known for its straightforward text and "contrasts" approach to providing wisdom and guidance...
PROVERBS 15:4
“Gentle words bring life and health; a deceitful tongue crushes the spirit.”
PROVERBS 16:24
“Kind words are like honey – sweet to the soul and healthy for the body.”
PROVERBS 11:9
“Evil words destroy one’s friends; wise discernment rescues the godly.”
PROVERBS 18:4
“A person’s words can be life-giving water; words of true wisdom are as refreshing as a bubbling brook.”
PROVERBS 12:18
“There is one who speaks rashly like he thrusts of a sword, but the tongue of the wise brings healing.”
JAMES 3:9-10
"With the tongue we bless our Lord and Father, and with it we curse men, who have been made in God’s likeness. Out of the same mouth come blessing and cursing. My brothers, this should not be!"
EPHESIANS 4:19
“Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.”
COLOSSIANS 4:6
“Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.”
PROVERBS 21:23
“Whosoever keeps his mouth and his tongue keeps himself out of trouble.”
PROVERBS 25:18
“Telling lies about others is as harmful as hitting them with an ax, wounding them with a sword, or shooting them with a sharp arrow.”
JAMES 3:5
“In the same way, the tongue is a small thing that makes grand speeches. But a tiny spark can set a great forest on fire.”
JAMES 1:26
“If you claim to be religious but don’t control your tongue, you are fooling yourself, and your religion is worthless.”
PROVERBS 17:18
“Even a fool who keeps silent is considered wise; when he closes his lips, he is deemed intelligent.”
PROVERBS 26:24-25
"A hateful man disguises himself with his speech, but he lays up deceit in his heart. When he speaks graciously, do not believe him, for seven abominations fill his heart."
And lastly, the stinger... by none other than Jesus Himself...
MATTHEW 15:35-37
“The good person out of his good treasure brings forth good, and the evil person out of his evil treasure brings forth evil. I tell you, on the day of judgment people will give account for every careless word they speak, for by your words you will be justified, and by your words you will be condemned.”
Okay. Other than getting a little chill at reading that last passage, we're otherwise getting the gist of just how pervasive and influential our words can be. On others. Even on ourselves.
SOME OTHER QUOTES THAT YOU MAY FIND INTERESTING...
“Be careful with your words. Once they are said, they can be only forgiven, not forgotten. Words are free. It’s how you use them, that may cost. Words can inspire. And words can destroy. Choose yours well. Our words have power. They impact others, but they also impact us.” — Michael Hyatt
“Study universal holiness of life. Your whole usefulness depends on this, for your sermons last but an hour or two: your life preaches all week. If Satan can only make [you] a covetous minister, a lover of praise, of pleasure, of good eating, he has ruined your ministry. Give yourself to prayer, and get your texts, your thoughts, your words, from God.” — Robert Murray McCheyne
FINAL THOUGHTS
Our words reflect our own inner-being. However, our words can also affect our own inner-being, as well as that of other people.
The logical sides of our brains receive new information (like words) into memory. The emotional sides of our brains then pick it up and attach an emotion or predisposed response to it; whatever it may be. The "mind" then alters whatever associated speech, and will reflect this equation:
New Information + Our Response to that Information = How we'll then Think about It and Speak about It.
The logical mind relays spoken or written word information to the emotional mind, which then either has a response to it, or is indifferent. If there's a response, the emotional mind reinterprets the information to coincide with the emotion(s) triggered. The emotional mind then tells the logical mind the new "meaning" of the original information. The logical mind then either accepts or rejects the new information (in place of old information). Whichever version the logical mind holds onto, that's what will be verbalized.
The caveat is that the emotional mind can be in the driver's seat at the moment, and will dictate our immediate thoughts and verbalization — however illogical or irrational the reinterpretation is.
Thus, the first step to learning to control what we say or don't say — is learning to better control how we think and what we allow into our minds. Not all information is beneficial or even useful to us. We have to pick and choose with each thought. Test the information as best we can. Adjust accordingly...
I propose that we strive to remain reasonably open-minded, but not so much as to potentially create internal disarray that could trample down our internal core principles and cause us to be double-minded and unstable in all that we do.
That's the topic of the next blog post, where we'll pick this mantle back up. We'll focus more on mindset; how to train our minds (according to God's instruction), how to mitigate emotional "clouding," and how to better filter the information that we allow into our minds.
Feel
free to pass this blog along if you're blessed by it and/or feel that
someone that you know might experience the same.
Have thoughts, tips, or suggestions? Let us know in the comments below!
Thanks, and have a blessed day!
Wow, that was incredible! You said it all! We need to watch what we allow in our minds and be quick to listen and slow to speak. Those scriptures, say it all, our bible is our roadmap if we will just open it up and read it.
ReplyDeleteTruly blessed to have you, someone with great wisdom and words to help us understand. Thank You for writing this, it really touched me!! God Bless You and I hope you have an amazing week!
Look forward to more!!
Thank you! Awesome feedback... agreed! I'm glad it touched you, God Bless you too; have a great rest-of-your-week!
Delete2 more parts to this particular blog coming soon!
Excellent blog! Very well put together! Lots of scripture to back it all up too!
ReplyDeleteThank you! Oh yeah... Scripture wisdom is at the heart of it, so it's super-important to include a large helping of that! Have a blessed day!
Delete